MCA Checks Out(a long and forgotten blog)

A lot of people are way younger than I, so they probably wouldn't know what the fuck is up with Mr. Yauch. Well I'll tell you one thing young lad. MCA's dead. Go figure.

Honestly, I didn't like "grow up" listening to the Beastie Boys. I was in kindergarten I believe when they were makin' waves in the US.

Sorry if I was really into Ice Ice Baby back then.

I started trippin' on the Beasties back in college. A friend of mine intro'd me to this Beastie Boys album one morning called Paul's Boutique, and I was chanting "Johhny Ryall! Johnny Ryall!" like a crazed drughead after lunchtime.

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Then on my way home, I passed by this record store named Odyssey and saw two CDs that caught my eye. A "Best Of"  album of some sort by The Who, and another "Best Of" album of some sort by The Beastie Boys. I immediately purchased 'em both!

Thanks to this show, I knew about two The Who songs prior to that purchase.

In perspective(or should I say in my honest fuckin' opinion), MCA's voice is the least liveliest. I mean, I guess MCA's voice isn't as high-pitched or "cheeky-soundin'" as the other two. But he sounded the coolest. That's because the other two sounded like a bunch of prebuscent losers.

Rest in peace oh coolest Beastie Boy! See 'ya in heaven!





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Ted

Who knew Seth McFarlane did live-action flicks? Initially, when I saw the poster to this movie while choosing my own(movie) adventure, I saw Seth's name.

I thought it was Seth Green so I was thinking this shit's gonna' be hilarious!

But then I noticed it was Seth McFarlane, the cartoon guy!

Still funny, not bad.

Ted is about this Teddy bear of course, who's John Bennett's(Mark Wahlberg) best friend since he was eight. So far, Ted's the funniest teddy bear in entertainment history! He's candid, sexual, frank, witty, a chronic, and of course, funny.

And he's naked too.

I can't enumerate his jokes here. I'm too lazy for that. but I can guarantee that you'll be laughin' when you watch it.

During the early parts, I recognized an artist by the song that was playing and the voice that was singin'. I guessed that it was Nora Jones. now guess where John tried to redeem Lori Collins(Mila Kunis) broke up with him. Yep. A Nora Jones concert.

Who was fucked by the penisless Ted in this flick.

Sam "Flash Gordon" Jones' cameo was a total surprise. Yes, they used to watch it as a kid. But that cameo totally came out of nowhere. And it was a vital part of the plot too! Sam Jones was the reason Marky-Mark and Mila Kunis broke up in the first place.

Commendations too for the nostalgic tunes that were played. Besides that Flash Gordon theme by Queen, Mark also had the intro to Knight Rider and the Imperial Death March(that "Darth Vader Song").

Which Mila Kunis said sounded negative. Not for us it's not!

This flick gets an 8.5 outta 10.

Just because.

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Bourne Legacy

This is one helluva ride! Literally, this flick's gonna' take you places. As far as my own backyard. Basically, it all started with the headshot of London journalist Mr. Ross. Then it all snowballed from there. The movie sorta' implied that Mr. Matt Damon himself did the headshot.

Jeremy Renner did a good job rebooting the franchise. he looked cool warding off wolves in the northern American wilderness. It kinda' reminded me of The Grey.

Liam Neeson? Psh.

It was very nostalgic looking at Jason Bourne's name engraved in a wooden double-deck bed. I thought Jason Bourne was the only person in that Treadstone fiasco. I didn't know that there were many other "participants" in that program. So the gov't had to clean up all the other "participants" to clean up their mess. Too bad for 'em Renner was just too slippery.

The janitor to clean up the mess.

Rachel Weisz was also perfect for the role. Not just because she's cute, but because she really looked like a hot scientist. Hearing her say "Manila, Philippines" was music to my ears. But the deranged scientist who shot all the people in the lab gave me the creeps because it had a stark contrast to the Aurora, Colorado movie theater shootings, and all other shooting incidents in the US.

The Joker's on the loose!

The chase scene in Manila was the best chase scene that I've ever watched. It was even better that the Matrix Reloaded highway chase scene. The length of the chase added to the scene's excitement. The chased and chaser first started off on foot, running through the depressed areas in the metro. Then it went to the streets and overpasses, which was always crowded.

97 million Filipinos should watch this just because.

Now here's where the movie gets creative. How the hell can a chase scene in the traffic congested-streets of Manila transpire? Simple. Ride a bike and avoid the vehicles.

Stealing bike's is the nation's favorite pastime.

To a casual viewer, it was just a long chase scene with parkour and bike stunts. For me, it was a chase scene that took a lot of turns, skidded a lot of corners, and reached a lot of places like Edsa, Novotas, Marikina, etc. That was why I felt so freakin' tired after all of it, with adrenaline oozing even as I walked out the mall.

Some points for improvement are still needed though to make this film more realistic. First was John Arcilla who played the security guard in the drug factory, He shouldn't be speaking flawless, English-accented English!

You should be working in a call center, mister!

Another was the scene where Rachel was buying meds from a small pharmacy. The vendor wasn't speaking to her in English. What the hell does Rachel know about our vernacular?

WTF are you tellin' me?!?

Other than those glitches, it's a 9/10.

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The Amazing Spiderman

What Batman Begins did to the Batman franchise, The Amazing Spiderman did to the whole Spiderman-Tobey Maguire shebang. The Amazing Spiderman was darker and more realistic.

Superheroes who use their cellphones don't lose but actually earn coolness points.

We noticed too that the movie didn't rely entirely on CGI when showing the webslinger's aerial moves.

The question is, is it Andrew Garfield, or some stuntman behind that suit?

The storyline here is pretty much at par with what was in the comic book. The thing was that I found the lizard pretty ugly.

Could've been better.

Emma Stone's continued use of her bedroom voice paid dividends for her character. The audience found an erotic driving force for Peter Parker to do what he does best.

Talking on his cell phone.

Good job for Uncle Benny(Ben) and Auntie May. Some characters to keep the subject grounded. But damn you Martin Sheen for making me shed a tear with your voicemail speech to Peter towards the ending.

Sorry Martin, damn your son instead!

This flick deserves an 8.5 outta 10.

Minus .5 for Emma Stone not showing us her boobs!

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Hotel Transylvania

Just another CGI flick with a couple of laughs here and there, Maybe the kid in me is just slowly aging, that's why I wasn't that into it. Maybe I was wanting to watch Resident Evil 5 or Judge Dredd more. Or maybe, I was just expecting more. You know, like something from Pixar, or even Dreamworks.

Maybe I was just expecting Buzz Lightyear to show up, that's all.

The story itself was complete. I just felt that there could be more. As in more vampire action? You know me, I just love those teleportationesque vampire moves. But all I got were a couple of smokey vanishes here and there, and the proverbial bat transfiguration.

Where the f*ck is LEstat when I need him?

Believe it or not, the love theme of Hotel Transylvania is pretty similar to Twilight's. The vampire-human love story? It's a thing right now.

Hotel Transylvania pretty much.

The voice actors were excellent. Except for Steve Buscemi. I noticed that the werewolf's voice sounded kinda' familiar. But that was it! the rest were stealthy.

Adam Sandler? Who would've thought??

Overall rating for this CGI-induced flick is 6/10.

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Of All The Things

Taken 2 was supposed to be viewed. I dunno why I ended up with Of All The Things. It's OK though because I enjoyed the flick. It was refreshing to watch these types of flicks(way different from how The Mistress looked), plus I got to support our Filipino flicks!

If it means supporting this guy, why not?!

Of all the things is basically what happens when a professional fixer with lots of connections teams up with a certified public notary and left to create havoc.

Well, not necessarily this type of Havok, but you get the picture.

A professional fixer named Berns(Regine Velasquez) happens to chance upon this law graduate named Umboy who works under his umbrella stall("Umbrella Boy", UMBOY, get it?) as a certified public notary when she was in dire straits and needed some legal counseling to sort out her "fixastrous" ways.

A reason why I enjoyed this flick was the familiarity and chemistry between Aga and Regine. These guys go all the way back to 2001's "Pangako Ikaw Lang", so no wonder they know how the other thinks while they're on set.

Lucky for 'em, they didn't end up like Brangelina.

And also, it was the same director who came up with Of All The Things and "Pangako.." Ms. Joyce Bernal.

Who's probably swimming in cash right now because of the Php 4million that they made on opening day.

I was actually expecting Regine to be fatter here because you know, Mrs. Alcasid! But no, she didn't look bloated like a mom that just gave birth. The reason? It was done 3 years ago! I was fooled!

He still looks the same though.

Aga also looked the same. But so does his acting. It's just a one-size fits all type of acting. I wasn't convinced enough that he was a law graduate in this flick. Though in fairness, he did his homework on the law terms that he's supposed to dictate here. Same thing with Mark Bautista. He didn't look like he was studyin' law hard enough here.

He should've just sang some songs.

Poor choice for choosing Callalily playing in their CamSur trip fiesta thingy. I guess they were the only variety band around the mainstream who could cover and do a rock rendition of the song Of All The Things. It was sappy though, not rock enough! Good choice though for choosing Tommy Abuel as Aga's dad. I just learned from my mom while we were watchin' the flick that he's actually a lawyer in real life!

Well, who would've thought?

As for the cameos, they were pretty solid cameos. Some just slightly solid(like Midas Marquez just bein' passed by whil the camera was panning to the left during the start), and some really solid ones(like Mitra and Chiz as themselves throwin' multiple liners).

As for who's hotter, Bamboo or Chiz? John Lapus settled that argument in this flick.

I would give this film a decent 7 outta 10.









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The Mistress

The John Lloyd-Bea Alonzo combo never fails to deliver. I bet this was another blockbuster because I only heard about this movie through word of mouth(though I'm sure I've seen the trailer before, but it was forgotten into obscurity), and I've heard it from lots of mouths!

Rumour-mongering, better than the internet!

Now I got to watch this film on a Monday night. And the house was packed to the rafters! On a fuckin' Monday! And it wasn't even a holiday! I just love the Filipino audience!

Worth dying for? Just the audience for now.

The John Lloyd-Bea("Jobeloyd"?) loveteam I believe will only lose its lustre when they grow into old geezers. They can milk that fuckin' cow for decades to come! Believe you me. As long as people are in love and cheesy, then they can just expect the milk and make it rain! Proof of this is that the last movie John lloyd and Bea did together was "Miss You Like Crazy" which was back in 2010. Two years from now, they just picked up where they left off. It's as if nothing happened!

Though I'm sure somethin' kinky happened here.

Let me just comment about some points. The main good point, being the chemistry between the two. That's because they have plenty of romantic movies under their belts. They can cry with each other virtually at will I suppose, so acting just comes naturally.

The story's pretty cool too! John Lloyd's dad(Ronaldo Valdez) and John Lloyd(Eric a.k.a. "JD") were in love with the same chick(Bea as Sari a.k.a. "Rosario"). Well actually, Bea was only a mistress(SPOILER ALERT!) so Ronaldo Valdez's character couldn't possibly be in love with her.

But still, screwing!

So that's a really cool plot brewing right there right? But as all good things go, they all come to an end. As I've expected, this would never have a happy outcome, with all the complications of the situation goin' on.

But as you know with Filipino romantic films, even if the ending is a sad one(a.k.a. "the couple doesn't end up together"), they still managed to turn it into a smiler because of a lot of "what-ifs" being imagined by the 2 main lovers. What if they didn't break up? What if John Lloyd's dad wasn't in the picture? What if Bea wasn't a mistress?

"What If" by Babyface topped at #80 and #28 in the US Billboard and US R&B charts respectively. 

This flick gets an 8 outta 10 for the kinda' original screenplay, superb "Jobeloyd" chemistry, and for Bea showing us her cleaves and how firm it was(as shown by John Lloyd applying some pressure on it.)

Thanks!

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