UFC 124

John "Doomsday" Howard - Thiago "Pitbull" Alves
2 Strikers who like to stand and bang. For all I know, John Howard may be the only pure striker Thiago Alves has ever faced in the UFC. So far, he has been facing wrestlers. And they're top-flight wrestlers too at that like GSP, John Fitch and Matt Hughes.

Not these wrestlers.

This fight showed that precision striking always outclasses power-strikes, as you would clearly see in the main event. But if you would ask me, I would always pick the jazz bass over the precision bass. And just as I've predicted, whoever feels that his stand-up isn't working would decide to take it to the ground first. And Howard was that dude. He tried the take-downs 'till he was down on the judges scorecards.


Mac Danzig - Joe "Daddy" Stevenson
These guys should have been scrapped from the UFC roster a couple of events ago. With a win-loss record similar to the Los Angeles Clippers, who would not want to give 'em the pink slip, right?

Well apparently, Dana White wants his fighters goin' down swingin'. Which was what Joe Daddy was doin' when he got knoced the fuck out by a Danzig hook, while backpedaling! Chuck Liddell lives!


Charles Oliveira - Jim Miller
We all knew that this was gonna be MIller time. Apparently, Oliveira didn't get the memo.

Charles should have the superior grappling(w/that kinda' last name, he better be a blackbelt!). But what happened was pretty bizaare. After a hurried scramblefest, the animal known as Jim Miller got a hold of Oliveira's leg and presto! We got to relive Mir-Lesnar I all over again(remember the kneebar?)!


Matt Riddle - Sean Pierson
If there was a robbery during this event, this was it. I don't know why Matt Riddle always ends up in the undercard. Man this guy eats punches in bunches for lunch while smilin' and will gobble a head kick for dessert and still hook you up with her hot sister(if he had one) after the program. He's that type of fighter! But still I don't know why he was fighting this Pierson guy(sorry, can't remember where I watched this dude) in an undercard bout. Another one of 'em Joe Silva mystery match-ups.

It was plain to see that Pierson was connecting more solidly. Riddle even ate a hook to the jaw while doin' a half-hearted flying knee, therefore dropping like a sack of potatoes.

The thing that I like most about Riddle is his ability to absorb punishment, and still dish out some of his own. Which was what he did from the 2nd round onwards. Though I think that it wasn't enough to steal round 3. But still, a win is a win. It's like all the people behind the scorecards suddenly all turned Russian judge on Pierson. Well I guess he's Canadian, that's why.


Sean "Big Sexy" McCorkle - Stefan "Skyscraper" Struve
This fight had a funny trivial stat. These 2 dudes make up the tallest combined height among all the fights that went down in the UFC. But it doesn't matter because for me, these 2 are as irrelevant to the UFC heavyweight division as Apollo Creed is to the WBO/IBF heavyweight division or somethin'.

Sean was bein' overly-hyped by Joe Rogan(as always), just because of that 1st round submission of Mark Hunt. We were unaware that someone the likes of Struve would be the one to put a stop to Joe's overrating.


Mark Bocek - Dustin Hazelett
If there was a fighter who would win because his last name sounds like the last name of the fighter in the blue corner og the main event, then it's Mark Bocek. I was actually rooting for Bocek because he's game, and also because Hazelett eeriely looks like a carbon copy of Tamdan "Barncat" McCrory.

Looks aside, I was predicting a Bocek win because Hazelett only has jits to offer while Bocek has a lot more in his arsenal. It's like showin' another guy your dick when he has his own dick too.

The strange thing was that instead of Bocek winning via a predictable decision or via strikes, he actually slapped on a triangle choke while dishing out some elbows to the head. Hazelett should be the one doin' that, right? Is today opposite day?


Josh Koscheck - GSP
If you wanna' get rich quick, then you should've bet your entire house and let it ride on a GSP win. This dude's pretty scary! BEsides the fact that he's a genetic freak, he's also under the Greg Jackson camp.

For all you giblets not in the know, Greg Jackson is a master game planner. For the Thiago Alves fight, GSP used superior wrestling. For the BJ Penn fight, he utilized take downs again to tire Penn's arms or somethin' like that. And in this match, since Koscheck is one of the purest and most decorated douchebags, err, wrestlers, GSP used superior striking.

And by striking, I meant boxing. I don't know if GSP hung out at the wild card gym in LA, but I do know that GSP trained his boxing under world-renowned trainer Freddy "The Cock" Roach(just made up that nom de guerre). If BJ Penn and GSP boxed right now, I don't know if GSP would still end up with a bloody nose(like in their 1st encounter). Maybe BJ might end up with a broken orbital(just like Kos). That's because of the newest weapon that GSP got from the Cock. The left jab.

This may sound cliche, but this PPV has been a great night of fights nonetheless.



*images from vis-soft.com, news.bbc.co.uk

"Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows(Part 1)"

They should've made this into one 5 hour flick or somethin'. I don't have the time to wait for the 2nd installment. We were all left "hangin'"!

And I don't get what's up with digital 2D? I thought it was 2.7D(or more commonly known as "converted 3D"). But it was just digital somethin'-somethin'. They didn't even bother to do digital HD or somethin'(if there was such a thing like that).

Anyway, the difference was just PhP10, so I gladly paid the difference, but I didn't really get to see that much difference between the regular and the "digital 2D" thing.

The HP franchise has really come a looooong way from where it began. Mr. Radcliffe is already an old guy. Same thing with Ms. Watson. She's a "full-grown mammal" right now. As for Rupert Grint, he looks like he does too much partying because his eyebags could fill myschool books! He better rest. The franchise has already taken away his childhood, what else does he want taken away?

This is what they do when not busy shooting.

Bill Nighy did an impeccable job portraying the Minister of Magic. Very far from what Davy Jones was doin'. And I really hate Dolores Umbridge's guts, straight from the book!

All I can say is that I am very very impatient and can't wait for the finale.

Overall rating-8 out of 10. Impressive effects make it an 8.3 out of a 10.



*images from webhush.com, readingharry.com

Gin Blossoms(Live in Manila)

This was the shizznit! A lot of shit happened last Thursday. I'm so fockin' busy that I only got to write about this shit just now.

I was actually late for the event. It was slated for 8PM, but it was almost 9 when I arrived. I was supposed to meet up with my bro GP and his girlfriend She. But instead, I ended up with my other friends who I was with when I watched Toto(namely Al and Emil, plus Al's wife, Robby and some other girls that I just met, namely Zai and She[again!]).

When I arrived, it was the last song of the Australian band Fahrenheit 43(who I got to take a picture of outside their tour bus before they left). Technically, I didn't give a fuck about the front acts. But I now respect Fahrenheit 43 because their guitarist was so polite and humble, and their vocalist was so hot!

I'm just sizzlin' beside the vocalist right here.

Now when Gin Blossoms were setting up onstage, we guys were guessing as to what song was gonna be played first. We were damn sure that it wouldn't be comin' from their new album No Chocolate Cake, so we guessed some classics like Allison Road and the ever-popular Hey Jealousy. But our friend Robby got it right. It was Follow You Down.

They of course played songs from their new album(just like GP predicted), but it was just like 3 or 4 songs(plus a cover, I forgot). My favorite among their new songs that caused earworms was Ms. Disarray(doesn't look like I spelled that right).

I was still high after the concert. Little did I know that the night was just gonna get more interesting after I stepped out of the concert.

What happened was that Al's car was parked just outside the entrance/exit of rockstars/basketball players comin' to from the Araneta Coliseum. Now before we hopped onto the car, I saw Fahrenheit 43 just about to get into their tour bus, so i quickly did a snapshot with 2 of the band members. For some reason, another fan ruined the pic by joining in when it was I who grabbed Fahrenheit 43's attention(check out pic above, guy to the extreme right, that's the fucker!).

Then the cherry on top for the night happened. Just as we were driving out of the parking lot, there he was, Rob Wilson(Gin Blossom's vocalist) himself, running with his wife and some handlers. They were like in that Paul McCarnney song "Band On The Run". They were literally running. Too bad for 'em some stalkers have already taken their posts outside the gates, and we also saw him so we jumped out of the car and swarmed the poor guy.

Blurry pics really don't do any justice.

I was one of the lucky few who grabbed a quick snapshot with the rockstar. Now that my life is complete(I got to brush shoulders with an international rock star), I can now rest in peace.

This was the vehicle that the Gin Blossom God hopped into.

'Till My Heartaches End

Kim Chiu is so thin! If I was Gerald, I'd go for that other chick who played his ex in this film. Now that's some yummy shit! Kim on the other hand, not so much.

Kim Chiu on opening night.

Well it's the usual Pinoy movie plot for this flick. The love story shit really gets stale, especially if the title of the movie is a title of a past hit. Which is the standard right now for Pinoy movies. If you want your movie to be a hit here, and it's not the Metro Manila Film Festival yet, then make sure that your movie title must be a song title of some past, cheesy hit.

I guess same thing goes for this movie...

The chronological distortion technique that they've used in this flick really sucked! It wasn't anythin' like 21 Grams or The Prestige. They just inserted flashbacks in between the real time event(which is Kimerald sitting in a coffee shop, talkin' about breakin' up)just to show us that they can do somethin' different other than the usual chronological style that directors here seem to collectively have.

As for Mr. Anderson, if it wasn't for this flick, I wouldn't know that he could speak fluent Tagalog. I don't watch PBB and ABS-CBN shows so I really wouldn;t know shit, right? That's why.

I thought this dude only knew Portuguese and a li'l English?!

Overall rating is 4.5 out of 10 due to the fact that the plot and story are lame!



*images from askmen.com, jasperfforde.com, costumeskeleton.com, rochellesychua.com 

Unstoppable

Have you seen any Wesley Snipes flicks lately?

Oops! Sorry! That ain't the promotional movie poster. Here it is.

我去过中国两次 为什么

Not the Asian version, dammit!

That's more like it!

Any film by Tony Scott is an instant winner. Now this film is from Tony my man. If you base everything on logic alone, then it means that Unstoppable is a winner because it was directed by Tony! The first shots of the film(where the trains suddenly go all blurry) are all pure Tony Scott!

Denzel is also bein' his usual self here in this flick. You know, with the Training Day-like statements and stuff. The only difference is that instead of taking on the action roles, he's now slowly bein' eased into the "old-man/daddy(pre-grampa)" roles, as evidenced by him having full-grown daughters who are working themselves through college, and by him working at the train station since 1981(shit, even older than I).

Working since 1981 will make you look a li'l somethin' like this.

Chris Pine is Chris Pine. Same dude from Star Trek.

Star Trek! Not Star Wars!

Same acting chops. Same everything! I guess that's why he missed out on the lead role for Tron. It's because he's always the same. the only thing that looked different is his face in the movie poster. He looks like Paul Walker!

Not a gay-looking version like this of course.

Lew Temple(that dude that played Ned) is really one of the versatile actors around Hollywood. He's described as a chameleon when it comes to acting, which says a lot. And if you notice, Lew was actually the same dude that played the county sheriff in the movie 21 Grams.

Rosario Dawson doesn't really deviate much from her roles, because I guess that's her comfort zone. You know, bein' a professional woman who works for the government or some kinda' agency. That's about it.

This should've been titled "Stoppable" because the train could be stopped easily anyway. A chopper just has to drop a man on the train to stop it. But they only thought of that in the end?!? Don't tell me Pennsylvanians are that stupid.

They could've been doin' this to begin with.

And lastly, whatever happened to the train full of kids? I was waiting for the train to slam into their car, causing chaos. But they were suddenly....gone.

Overall rating is 6.5. But since it's a Tony Scott film with Denzel in it, it suddenly becomes an 8 out of 10. Good stuff!






*images from regrettablesincerity.com, www.clamack.hpg.ig.com.br, popstarsplus.com, blog.80millionmoviesfree.com, onlinemovieshut.com, mymoviecinema.com

"Stone"

Edward Norton deserves my "ticket for the party of awesome actors" right here. I kinda' don't like Edward initially because his voice in narratives seems to be just that same, droning voice. But here, his voice is that of a high-spitched, West coast, white trash thug. He must've done some method acting on this one. Hence, the transformation.

Didn't I tell you not to use drugs during method acting?

Robert De Niro just gives out his usual, vintage, De Niro performance here. You know, the grumpy type like that stepdad in Meet The Fockers. That's all that he's gonna be from here thereon.

I somehow see stagnation when it comes to Robert De Niro's acting.

Now here's the sleeper, Milla Jovovich. Honestly, I don't find her hot in any of the Resident Evil installments. I just watched that shit because I used to play the game back then. And that's it!

Emma Stone and "Stone"? Why not?

 But here, woooh! Dang! Hotness! The boobs though are a liability, but all in all, hot! I like her look with her hair gone wild! Not the prim and sleek hair that she has in Resident Evil. 

Now we're talkin'!

I expect nothing less than an Oscar nomination out of Mr. Fight Club himself(well, half of FC that is, sorry Brad!). As for De Niro, your act is nothing new to garner something out of the academy.

Overall rating is 8 out of 10 because I was kinda' left hangin' in the end, wanting more! Give me my STONE!








*images from i.dailymail.co.uk, www.shockya.com, www.filmofilia.com, joyhog.com,

"The Other Guys"

I was just stumped at the fact that Dwayne Johnson and Samuel L Jackson died instantly in this one. I thought that they were the fuckin' supercops. But they died! What a bunch of losers. Good stuff too that Foo Fighters' "My Hero" was playing while they were falling to their deaths.

Allen Gamble(Will Ferrell) and Terry Hoitz(MArk Wahlberg) play disgraced New York cops who do the paperwork for the cops that they idolize(namely The Rock and Sam). I was LOL when Wahlberg shot Derek Jeter(as himself) in the Yankees Stadium. Very stupid.  

Eva Mendes' beauty was uncovered here fully I think. 

Wasn't it already uncovered before?

I already noticed her ass in Too Fast, Too Furious. But she's on a whole 'notha level right here. Can't believe Gamble was allowing Hoitz to talk to his wife(Mendes) like that. 

The hidden gem here for me is Michael Keaton(Capt. Gene Mauch). He keeps mentioning TLC song lyrics without him even noticing it. Now who the fuck would say , "Don't go chasin' waterfalls!". Hilarious shit! 

Can't find quick Keaton movie pics. Here's Batman instead.

Nice soundtrack too. Little River Band rocks! I didn't know that "Pimps Don't Cry was a real song(during the end credits). And I knew that it was The White Stripes' music that was playin' in the background during the shootout in the building after the shareholder meeting.

All in all, 7.5 out of 10 for hilarity.








*images from deadline.com, mos.totalfilm.com, blog.newsok.com

Ang Guro

Just viewed this last month. If it wasn't for school shit, I wouldn't be in the know that such a play existed.

Tickets cost Php250. But that's cool because what we got in exchange for purchasing the ticket is the non-submission of our final product(which is something that we just make up and produce and in our case, we came up with "anti-hangover" pills).

This play was headlined by Karel Marquez(yes, the same gal with the scandal who used to VJ for MYX).

In fact, Karel was the only A-lister here(together with her mom Pinky[Pinky Marquez is Karel's mom, right?] who did a special participation on this one). The rest of the cast were virtual unknowns, though some of their faces looked familiar.

Paul Ballano was the script-writer and director for this presentation. He should thank God for his sense of humor because if he wasn't funny, I wouldn't remember him at all. Kudos to him too that he chose to honor our country's teachers in this one. Teaches are really one of the most underrated people in society.

The dude who played Mr. Inspection(or was it Inspecion?) was pretty good. If it wasn't for his role-playing, I would really think that he's gay. Plus the other chubby teacher has pretty good acting chops too. Exaggerated gestures are really a must to succeed in stage plays.

Karel did a wonderful job onstage as Ms. Resontoc()or was that Resonto?), the teacher(who apparently was Paul Ballano's 1st Grade teacher in real life). Do you remember how your kind-hearted, stress-free teachers used to talk to you back in the day? That was how Karel talked the entire time. It's as if she's in the zone to be a goody-two-shoes faculty member. Her refreshing face helped a lot too.

Refreshing, not alluring/seducing.

Whoa whoa whoa! Not that type of fresh! I mean this...

Now, that's better!

The only part that I didn't like was the singin'. I don't know what it is, but there's just something about musicals that bore me to death.

Overall, this play merits a 7/10 due to the fact that I was amused for like 2 hours.



*images from www.abante-tonite.com, fhm.com.ph

RED

The secret agent/CIA stuff never really gets old.It could look old though if you place in guys like Morgan Freeman, Bruce Willis, John Malkovich and Helen Mirren in it. Plus place in there too that dude who played Agamemnon(did I spell that right?) in Troy, and it really looks old! And also, that dude who was in line buying the RED movie tickets looked old too. I feel like I'm entering a Jackie Chan movie(where almost all the members in the audience are like 35 or way older). These are the same guys who watched Die Hard I in theaters back in the day(and they were in their prime back then).


The leads were so in theirpost-post-primestate that Karl Urban looked young and preppy amongst 'em. Bruce Willis even called Urban(who played Cooper, one of CIA's heads), "6'1 with the cute hair..." I guess you could call his hair cute if you yourself are balding and your hair follicles aren't motivated(or stimulated, whatever) to grow(just like Willis'). Demi Moore might've left Bruce because of his lack of head hair. I think she wants her man's hair just like the head of a Viking's(perhaps like Ashton's?).


Bruce Willis really revels in roles wherein he doesn't have to do any shouting. He always wants to take it easy on his larynx. I mean, come on. Give me a scene from any of the last 10 Bruce Willis flicks where he was required to shout a lot. Man he doesn't even talk loud enough to be John McClane. His voice always seems smooth and suave. Hence, the bald guy roles.
Morgan Freeman just isn't cut out for action flicks like these. Even if he's RED(Retired and Extremely Dangerous) int his movie, he just ain't athletic enough. Helen Mirren can beat this geezer in a foot race. Plus he(Freeman) doesn't look like an 80-year old with stage 4 liver cancer(his role in the movie).


Helen Mirren really looks old in this one. I mean, she looks old when she played Queen Elizabeth. but man, time flies by so fast. For me, she kinda' looked different in a short span of time. But her accent really kicked ass!


My favorite here is of course, Mr. John Malkovich. Not only does he bring the much needed comic relief. He also embraces the old man role to the extent that he made old man synonymous to veteran killer. Add to that the fact that he did LSD for 11 years under a controlled, secret CIA program, then you really have a funny old junkie runnin' loose with the old dogs.


I wasn't really overwhelmed with this movie or anything like that. It was just what I expected. A bunch of retired CIA agents runnin' around and killin' people. Good job to John Malkovich for bein' the "glue guy" in this team. If you don't know what a glue guy is, think Scottie Pippen of the Bulls. Think Lamar Odom for the Lakers. Think Udonis Haslem for the Heat.


Offensively and defensively, they bring it to the table. Same thing with John.


My rating for this flick is 7 out of 10. If it wasn't for the glue guy, this would be a measly 6.






*image from www.scene-stealers.com

Funny People

Now where's McLovin' in this pic?

As the name of the title suggests, this flick is indeed about some funny-assed people. And since this was a Judd Apatow creation, I expected to crack up multiple times. And I did! Majority of my laughter was simulated by Adam Sandler's antics.

And also, since this was a Judd Apatow outing, I kinda' expected Michael Cera, Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill to be present. And there they were. Jonah Hill and Seth Rogen that is. 2 out of 3 ain't bad. The Superbad boys are at it again!

I found it pretty cool that Judd Apatow made a reference to Pink Floyd. Roger Waters to be exact. And this really cracked me up because what happened was, Adam Sandler and his new assistant Seth Rogen were invited to MySpace.com's anniversary party which was held at some other state so Seth and Adam flew in Adam's very own charter plane or private jet somethin'-somethin'.

Now you know those movie transitions wherein somethin' mellow is bein' played in the background while the current scene is transitioning to the next one? You know, like in the movie "Almost Famous" where the song "Tiny Dancer" was bein' played in the background while Stillwater's guitarist was bein' whisked off on a tour bus after a hard night's partyin' at some Random house in Topeka, KS?

Well it was somethin' similar to that in "Funny People" when they were goin' to the MySpace annual party. One of James Taylor's songs was being played in the background while they were boarding the private plane. Now as the scene transitioned to the MySpace party itself, there he was. James Taylor himself singin' the song that was playin' in the background.

When Seth noticed how cool it was to have James Taylor playin' at their party, the usher(or whoever that was guidin' the newly-arrived guests) said that the previous year they had Roger Waters doin' Dark Side Of The Moon. Now as a hardcore Pink Floys fan, and casual James Taylor listener, that's some funny shit right there!

I would like to say kudos to Marshall Mathers III for his acting here, but I won't. That's because he played as himself so he didn't require any method or whatever sort of acting there is. He dissed Ray Romano of the TV shows "Everybody Loves Raymond" pretty naturally, just like the real Slim Shady would!

The hidden gem here is Eric Bana, believe it or not. Who would've thought that Hector of "Troy" could be funny? I was really caught unaware. Yes, we know that he's Australian and shit, but he delivered his Australian-accented lines with conviction. Just like that Aussie croc guy who always goes, "Crikey mate!" Steve Irwin or Brady Barr or somethin'. All I know is that he's dead(R.I.P.). And he wasn't even killed by a croc! Just some stingray poisoning or something water-related. Poor croc-master.

I rate this movie 8 out of 10 just because of the fact that I love Happy Gilmore, Superbad, and Pineapple Express. Bring on the funnies!






*pic from www.thevine.com.au 

UFC 121[afterthoughts)

History was made on this one. This was more or less how this shit went down...

Brendan Schaub-Gabriel "Napao" Gonzaga

A heavyweight match-up of infinitesimal proportions. That's because I really don't give a flying fuck who wins between this match-up. As far as I'm concerned, Napao is as irrelevant as Mike Tyson is to the heavyweight division(just exaggerating of course).

But of course, like most pundits, I was pickin' Gabe to win. This hairy gorilla has one-pop KO power. His head kick of Cro Cop was heard all around the world, so I was thinking why the fuck did he stop leg-kicking at some point in the 2nd rd? Such a stupid gameplan. Schaub was bouncier and more fleet-footed, so peppering the kid with leg kicks should've slowed him down.

But no. He instead relied on his hands for that one punch KO. Bad move because he can't even tag Schaub. The kid's too fast for him. Therefore Schaub ran away with the unanimous decision V.



Tito Ortiz-Matt "The Hammer" Hamill

Apprentice meets Master in the octagon. That would be a lovely headline after this event. If you remember, Tito Ortiz was one of Matt Hamill's coaches during his stint at TUF. Good for Matt that he got all the lessons that he learned to compete inside the cage because he was the one dishing out the vicious GNP that Tito was known for when he was still dominant, and relevant(yes, I'm wondering why he's still on the UFC's roster).

Another loss for Tito. Another slew of excuses comin' up from Mr. Jenna Jamison.



Diego "Nightmare" Sanchez-Paulo Thiago

Didn't expect this one, really. I mean, Sanchez was very lackluster the last couple of outings(heck he was dissected by John Hathaway!). So I expected more of the same comin' into this fight.

But surprise, surprise! Diego looked like the Diego of old in this one. Fast-paced, relentless, and crazy(yes, he was shouting like a caveman when he slammed Paulo to the mat). I like this new and "re-dedicated" Diego. If he always fights like this, then I won't hesitate on placing some cheddar on him.



Martin "The Hitman" Kampmann-Jake Shields

Sorry to say this, but doesn't Jake look like a retard or somethin'? Plus one of the judges(I'm sure Cecil Peoples is somehow involved in this one) is also a retard for giving Shields the nod for the decision. It really sucks because the UFC wants to set up the title fight between Shields and current UFC welterweight kingpin, GSP. And the stupid refs are obeying orders from the UFC bigwigs like dogs! Shame on those sucky judges!

If you watch the fight, Jake only got the takedowns. But that's it! Kampmann was able to stand up from it anyway. Plus he busted up Shields' (retard) face pretty good. Kampmann doesn't have a single scratch(Jake Shields actually has pillows for fists). And if you watch the fight overall, it's very clear who won this shit. So I really don't get all of this crappy judging lately. It is indeed a crying shame.


Brock Lesnar-Cain Velasquez

The fight that I was actually waiting for. Even my elder bro who's not into MMA so much(he just watches if Anderson Silva or GSP is on) was waiting in anticipation for Brock Lesnar to clobber Brown Pride. Well, that was the prediction anyway. It didn't really happen though. It was the other way around.

This fight clearly shows that size doesn't matter. It's always gonna be skill/technique over strength(just like that "mind over matter" thing). Cain's wrestling is just too good(former NCAA Div.I wrestler), and he used it to stand back up(he was taken down by the monster twice if I remember correctly).

Another problem for Brock is that Cain has an unlimited gas tank. For me, Cain and GSP are the real cardio machines in this game. Shane Carwin lost steam when he was pounding on Brock. Cain didn't lose any, and was methodically picking his spots when he was doin' the pounding. Plus Brock's stand-up is really raw, so that's another department that Cain exploited.

My take on this is that Cain just watched all Lesnar tapes out there, and took in all the good things. He noticed that Randy was able to stand-and-bang('till he got clipped)with Brock so that was one area to exploit. Another was the ground-and-poundage of Carwin. He fused all these elements together, and coupled his freakish cardio with it to formulate the winning gameplan, which was what exactly went down last Sunday.

Now who's next? Junior Dos Santos could use the Cheick Kongo formula(remember when Kongo tagged Velasquez multiple times?) to end Cain's HW reign ASAP. The problem is that if push comes to shove, these wrestlers all go back to their bread and butter and take their opponents down repeatedly. If that happens, then game over for Dos Santos and we have to wait for a Carwin or a (new and improved) Lesnar to dethrone Cain(who's actually sponsored by Dethrone).

History was made tonight. That's how it went down...

UFC 120(afterthoughts)

I really wasn't lookin' forward to this card except for 3 fights that were in it, and they were the most important fights of the night(or day here). It involved 3 Brits who were headlining this London show. Namely, John Hathaway, Dan "The Outlaw" Hardy, and UFC(UK) poster-boy, Michael "The Count" Bisping.

So the 1st 2nd fights, I didn't really get to watch that much, which was kinda' wrong too if you look at it from a different perspective because the 1st 2 winners could be future contenders that we need to watch out for. The problem was that the 1st fight involved a lot of "grind-it-out" wrestling. Not too much technical fighting goin' on, so changin' channels was always an option.

John Hathaway-Mike Pyle- I was disappointed with this fight because this Hathaway kid has tons of upside. He's only 22 years old I believe. I mean, besides BJ Penn, it was Hathaway who handed Diego "Nightmare" Sanchez his own ass the last time both went at it. Who does that shit to Diego?!?

But here, it was a different story. Mike Pyle was the one doin' the ass-handling. Hathaway's brute strength wasn't enough to negate Mike Pyle's far superior wrestling(this guy trains at Extreme Couture). The 1st few take down defenses were pretty successful(all due to Hathaway's "young lad strength"), but the rest went straight to hell(or to the mat, down the drain, whatever). And not only that, Pyle's striking was technical too. Hathaway's longer reach wasn't worth shit to Pyle. He(Pyle) even switched levels a lot, which threw Hathaway off when it came to defense. Hence, the big L for Hathaway.

Dan "The Outlaw" Hardy-Carlos "The Natural Born Killer" Condit-This was guaranteed TNT! the only disgruntling thing was that my boy Dan Hardy was knocked out cold(well, his eyes were still open when he received the closing punches that ended the fight).

My money was actually ridin' on Condit(so good thing that he won), but that KO of Hardy was just brutal! I didn't expect that shit to go down like that. The left hook is indeed one of Hardy's more prominent weapon. And Condit isn't really known a a KO artist, so it was pretty foolish of Condit to be standin' and bangin' with Hardy like what he did in this fight.

But the reason why I bet on Condit was because he is like Nick DIaz in a sense that he'll beat you at your own game if you don't watch out. If you could strike, he would love to stand and trade blows with you. If you're the grappling type, he'll just out-grapple. So that just means that Condit's left hook was badder and meaner! It didn't really land first, but it connected clearer(both fighters threw left hooks before the lights went out for Hardy).

Mike "The Count" Bisping-"Sexyama" Yoshihiro Akiyama-I genuinely don't understand why Asian fighter's comin' from here crossin' over to the west can't tie up a decent string of wins and become successful. Even Asian fighters who grew up in the west can't seem to come up with something(i.e. Mark "The Filipino Wrecking Machine" Munoz and Philippe[did I spell that correctly] Nover). Guys like Brandon Vera and Yushin Okami can't seem to get past the tip of the iceberg. I'm not looking down at anyone here. But that's just the way it is I guess. Other races are physically superior than their Asian counterparts(taller, stronger, etc). The only exception(isn't that a Paramore song) is Manny Pacquiao.

Now in this fight, I think it's nearin' towards the end of the road for Akiyama. I mean, the dude had his chances, but he blew 'em. He wasn't ready to snatch a win against a B-Level Chris "The Crippler" Leben. He most certainly wasn't ready to steal the W against an always game Bisping, whose only strategy is to outpoint his opponents with soft, grazing punches. Lame, but effective nonetheless.

There you have it. A losin' night for British fight fans, but a winning night for me and fellow MMA junkies and maniacs. Next stoop, UFC 121! I'm salivating at the heavyweight fight of the century!


*image from octagonbuzz.com

The Town

This flick really threw me off. Not in a negative way. I mean, I really wasn't readin' or hearin' any reviews about this one, so I really had a clean slate when it came to comin' up with worthless opinions about the film overall. After all, opinions are like assholes. They all stink!

It's always a good thing to hang around afterwards and watch the credits rolling. If it wasn't for that, I wouldn't know that it was Ben "formerly Bennifer" Affleck who directed the flick. In all actuality, he is indeed a better playwright than actor. Man if Shakespeare sucked at acting, then can we all say that Ben Affleck is William Shakespeare Version 2.0? I don't really know where this is leading to, but the bottom line is that Mr. Bennifer(yes, I guess he's still Bennifer due to the Jennifer Garner thing) here is better off directing. I for one am a would-be sucker for all of his upcoming flicks.

The hidden gem here ladies and gentlemen, is none other than Mr. Hurt Locker himself, Jeremy Renner. Well Ben, Jeremy, and the others did a good job in switching the lever to the Irish-Bostonian/Charlestownian accent setting. Whoever their accent coach was(my guess is that it's the same accent coach who taught Forest Whitaker in speaking like Idi Amin in The Last King Of Scotland), he/she did a wonderful job in converting their tongues into fully-fledged semi-Irishmen.

The innovative thing that I saw was the part where the SWAT team threw a bomb at 'em and then everything went silent after the explosion. Well almost everything. except for the incessant ringin' sound. You know, that high-pitched sound you hear after your eardrums take in a sudden blastful? That was I think the first time that somebody got the actual feel of bein' blasted, and then simulated that feel and translated it into film for us viewers to experience. It's the li'l things like these that make my viewing superb. I live for these moments!

When everything's said and done, I'd give this movie a 9 out of 10 due to the fact that I was fully disoriented after that explosion I was talkin' about.


*image from IMDb.com

RocknRolla

Another one of 'em Guy Ritchie creations. If you're familiar with the movie feel of Snatch, then this one's pretty similar. Guy's films are like carnival rides. Once you begin the movie, the ride starts and then ends after the end credits. I know that description sucked, but you get my drift.

As I've said earlier, RocknRolla's like Snatch in a lot of ways. It overwhelms you with "Guy Ritchie Camera Shots"(you know, the fast panning and swift transitions, you know the fuckin' drill). It's also set in London, with the usual London gangsters. Lenny Cole's similar to Snatch's Brick Top.

Turkish's role is similar to that of One-Two's. Plus there's also a missing thing involved, which is the Russian's painting while in Snatch, it's 'Cousin' Avi's diamond. The Russians in RocknRolla can also be compared to the Jews of Snatch due to race I guess.

And Guy's penchant for shredding out facts while doin' a certain scene clearly shows here in RocknRolla(when Lenny explains how the local fish species was completely wiped out by its American counterparts in the River Thames). Back in Snatch, it's Brick Top explaining how starved pigs could chew through human bone and flesh like butter.

Another thing that could be compared if you ask me is Jason Statham and Mark Strong's narrating ala Fight Club's Edward Norton.

Now for the actors who stood out...

Gerard Butler a.k.a. "One-Two"- It's in this flick wherein I fully got to appreciate Gerard Butler's acting, even if he's in his comfort zone, which is doin' roles in his native accent. His dancing really blew me away, that's all I can say.

Idris Elba a.k.a. "Mumbles"- If it wasn't for The Losers, I wouldn't recognize this fucker.
Favorite line? "If I could be half the human being Bob is at the cost of being a poof, I'd have to think about it. Not for very long, but I'd have to pause. "

Tom Wilkinson a.k.a. "Lenny Cole"- Really has the greedy and evil look in him, just like in Batman Begins. Can you say he's got that "Gangster/Mafia" look?
Favorite line? "There's no school like old school, and I'm the fuckin' headmaster!"

Mark Strong a.k.a. "Archy"- Really looks familiar, but he wasn't really under my radar 'till Kick-Ass came out. A very solid performer, who can hold his own in every character he portrays. I really digged(yeah it's dug I know, but digged sounds more appropriate nowadays I think) how he interrupted Roman and Mickey in their studio usin' the studio microphone. Hilarious shit!

Thandie Newton a.k.a. "Stella[The Accountant]"- Reminded me a lot of Zoe Saldana. I also found her sexy when she started dancin' freakishly in that party when they were discussin' the 2nd job(or rather, "the heist").

Toby Kebbell a.k.a. "Johnny Quid"- Acted like a true rock'n rolla, no pun intended. That's because here, he plays a rock star who was always presumed dead. As the sayin' goes, "Rock stars are more famous when they;re dead. Johnny Quid's just cashin' in.

Tom Hardy a.k.a. "Handsome Bob"- If it wasn't for my bro's trained eye, I wouldn't have noticed that this was the same dude who played Eames in my 3rd favorite movie, which is none other than Inception(the 1st being "The Imaginarium Of Dr. Parnassus while the 2nd one is "The Matrix").

Lastly, RocknRolla's soundtrack sounded cool too. Full of old school rock songs! I give RocknRolla a 9 out of 10, due in large part to my bias for Guy Ritchie flicks. all I can say is that this flick fuckin' rocks!


*image from firstshowing.net

UFC 119(afterthoughts)

This card was stacked with potential. But only for the pre-main event cards though. The main event looked weak on paper(for Cro Cop was just a late sub). And that was what it really was. A bore!

Now here are my 2 cents for each of the fights:


(Melvin "The Young Assassin" Guillard VS Jeremy "Li'l Heathen" Stephens)
This had Fight Of The Night written all over it. Sadly, it went to the undercard fight between Matt "Meathead" Mitrione and Joey Beltran.

In this fight, we were supposed to see a much more rounded Guillard. He could've used his wrestling to bring Li'l Heathen(who's more naturally a striker) down on the mat. too bad he resorted back to his striking. It's good because he's exlosive and has power in his hands. Bad because he could've finished Stephens with some of his groun-and-pound. Good thing that he won. I am wondering who's next for Guillard. They should give him a top 10er, that's fo' sho'!


(Sean "The Muscle Shark" Sherk VS Evan Dunham)
This was highway robbery 101. Split decision victory for Sherk? Oh come on! The value of his name gave him the win, not anything else. I don't know what the judges were thinkin'! Honestly, the judges sucked on this card too. And guess who one of the judges were on this event. Cecil fuckin' Peoples! Man that judge's a rip!

Evan Dunham deserved the win more than the Muscle Shark. He's been tearin' it up in the lightweight division lately, and deserves to climb up the ladder more than Sherk.


(Matt "The Terror" Serra VS Chris "Lights Out" Lytle)
I thought that this fight will contain the KO Of The Night. Serra seemed to be more than happy to stand and bang with Lytle, which is a big no-no because he should be using his BJJ blackbelt on Lytle, who's more of a brawler. Though Lytle has a few submission wins himself. In the end, it's the bigger guy that wins.


(Antonio Rogerio Nogueira VS Ryan "Darth" Bader)
The Li'l Nog hype train needs to stop here. Rogerio seems to be just riding Minotauro's coattails because so far, his most impressive win in the UFC was against Luiz Cane. After that, it was all nothing. I mean, who almost loses to a late replacement Jason Brilz?!? Only over-hyped fighters, that's who.

Darth Bader showed in this one that he could hang with the big boys. This former TUF winner came in with only wrestling in his Arsenal. Now he's got submissions and some striking too! Good UD win for Bader!

(Frank Mir VS Mirko Cro Cop)
This was one of the worst main events that I've seen for a long time now. These 2 former champions fought as if they have a silent agreement in controlling octagon aggression. It looked like a glorified sparring match.

Well it seemed that way 'till before Cro Cop ate a Mir knee in the 3rd. Now that lulled him to sleep. Another W for Mir, albeit a lackluster one. IMO, Mir has already reached the Zenith of his improvement curve(he's 31), while Cro Cop should just hang it up. He has nothing to prove anymore. He's got legions of fans all over the world(especially in Croatia and Japan) and maybe he should just think about his safety and future.

Overall, a very weak card. That's why I can't wait for UFC 120. I'm rooting for Akiyama just because he's Asian and Bisping's too cocky. John Hathaway has got some serious upside so I dunno how he's gonna match up against Mike Pyle. But the fight that has detonation and fight of the night(nigh fight of the year!)written all over it is the Dan Hardy-Carlos Condit fight. Joe Silva(the current UFC matchmaker) is a genius! I'm currently salivating, just thinking of that wicked match-up!



*image from www.ufc.com

(my 3 cents on) Legend Of The Guardians: The Owls Of Ga'Hoole[3D]

Honestly, I haven't watched Happy Feet yet(just some clips from HBO), but I think Happy Feet was just as good as this.

I also honestly didn't believe that Zack Snyder was the director of this flick. But there I was, staring at his name during the end credits.

I was stoked when it came to the aerial shots that this flick offered. Especially in 3D, you could sorta' feel the air beneath your wings. The rain droplets also were very realistic. I was feelin' drenched after their flying lesson with Ezylryb. And I knew that it was Geoffrey Rush who was doin' Ezylryb because I could hear Captain Barbossa from Pirates Of The Caribbean.

I also heard Elrond/Agent Smith from the very start of the film when Noctus(Soren's dad) started speaking. Megatron without the Welker element anyone?

Eglantine was really cute. Not as cute as Agnes from Despicable Me though.

And what was it with the "metal flecks"? Anyway, nothin's real in that film so why bother questioning what a metal fleck is?

Overall,this is one flick that I enjoyed! An 8 out of 10 would be just appropriate.

And oh, that song from Owl City in the soundtrack was pretty obvious. I kinda' saw it comin' that they'll use Owl City in a movie about owls.




*image from blog.80millionmoviesfree.com

(my 3 cents on) Phobia 2

I didn't even know that there was a "Phobia 1".

I already have a moniker(if you could call it a moniker) for this movie. It's "Shake-Rattle-And-Roll, Thailand Version". That's because Phobia is essentially like that(Shake-Rattle-And-Roll, or SRAR from hereon). It's a movie with short stories in it, just like SRAR. But Phobia has more stories in it I think because as far as I can remember, SRAR has like 3(or 4 tops) stories to a movie while Phobia has 5. I could be wrong though.

Anyway, Phobia really brought out the fright in me. I can't remember screeching and screaming like that while watching SRAR. Consider the fact that I watched SRAR when I was a kid. And kids tend to be more frightened more easily than adults like me. That shows how frightening Phobia really is to the average movie-goer. Good thing that they made the last part funny. It's a funny ghost story is what it is.

Now for the short stories(in the movie), here are my 3 cents...I'll just label 'em in parts to avoid confusion.


Part I
This part made me cringe. Supernatural elements were at work. Trees were movin' and bushes were comin' to life. There was even an "unyango"(or a gecko, I don't know) which said, "Tuko!". I even reckon seein' a "kapre", or was that just a shadow? But I'm pretty sure that was a "kapre"(or a tree giant smokin' cigars). In the end, the shaolin boy turned to a tree.


Part II
For me, this was the scariest shit. I screamed out the loudest during this part. It was all about this kid involved in a motorcycle accident. He requested for a private ward, but he was placed inside a "shared" ward, with a dying patient beside him and only a curtain that separated them.

Now this dying patient was only breathing through a respirator, or breathing machine, or whatever that thing was. In short, he as a vegetable lyin' in soup. So it was really creepy when the kid peeped through the curtain, only to find out that the other dying patient wasn't in bed but was instead, standing behind him, staring like a madman. What's more, the dying patient(or it's a ghost or what not) was trying to strangle him every single time that the nurse wasn't in the room.


Part III
This one was about zombies. People in a truck were bein' smuggled. Or rather, drugs I believe were bein' smuggled, and they used the human bodies as vessels.

Obviously, the director got his cue from "Dawn Of The Dead" or "28 Days Later" because the zombies were running. Sprinting even! Not so scary though in my book. That's because I know I could outrun a zombie in real life. i just don't know if my cardio could hold though.


Part IV
The penultimate episode was kinda' scary too. It had shock factor like in the 2nd part. Ghosts were just suddenly poppin' up!

Here, ghosts in car wrecks haunt the new owners because the wrecked cars were only restored and sold as new. Have you ever ridden ridden in a car where people have died, or got killed in? You could just imagine the fear factor at work when it comes to drivin' haunted cars.


Part V
Finally, some comic relief. What's more, one of the PAs doin' the movie shoot(they were shooting about a movie about a person seeing ghosts) looks like Piolo Pascual.

The lead actress looked hot too! She's half-Caucasian I'm pretty sure. I bet she's a daughter of a white dude who happened to be on vacation in Bangkok(or Phuket or wherever) and somehow ended up fuckin' a Thai lady.


Overall, this was a 6 out of 10 for I really ain't a fan of horror movies. 9 outta 10 for frightening me. I'm just concerned that Philippine cinema is gettin' left behind in the dust. Our special FX is just not at par with the other Asian countries. I just don't get it!




*image from www.lynks4you.com

(my 3 cents on Resident Evil 4: Afterlife

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

(my 2 cents on)Despicable Me

I'm just amazed that this movie has its own song from hip-hop artist Pharrell Williams. Pretty cool!

Well Despicable Me really is not that despicable(like what Daffy Duck always says). It's actually a touching movie that centers on a "change-of-heart" theme, believe it or not. Well I saw that theme comin' a long time ago, ever since I saw in the movie trailer that he was adopting the kids. I instantly thought, "Oh, from criminal mastermind to kind-hearted dad. Yeah right, I know the drill".

I didn't expect that I was gonna be in for more. Laughs that is. Steve Carell is really amazing when it comes to voicing characters. There really is no hint of Steve Carell in Gru's voice because he did something to it. I believe it was the accent, added with some gruffiness.

Jason Segel(of How I Met Your Mother fame) also did a pretty good job voicing Vector. And so did Russell Brand, who did Dr. Nefario(the funny old scientist who did "Boogie" instead of "Cookie" robots). In all fairness, the Boogie Robots were a hit! I guess it was The Bee Gees that they were boogeying(did I spell that right? sounds like golf) to.

And I had a funny feeling that Gru's mom was being voiced-over by someone also famous. And I was right. I saw Julie Andrews in the credits.

With Miranda Cosgrove's hotness, she should've done a sexier character and not a kid!

I loved Agnes! She's now officially the cutest CGI kid(sorry kid from Monsters Inc). "It's so fluffy!"

Salt(afterthoughts)

Not bad for a post-cold war, USA-VS-Russia plot. Even with my "faux"-expertise movie storylines and everythin', I was still a bit confused about the early years of Chankov(Angelina Jolie). There was a part there in the movie wherein an infant Chankov died through health complications. She was even buried because there was a shot of a tombstone with a wreath of flowers laid on it.

But then suddenly, the baby was alive and was with another set of parents who died in a car accident! Lucky for Chankov, she survived and was taken by the CIA(or some American secret service member) to the US, where she bacame Evelyn Salt. The thing was that where in the fuckin' depths of Mordor did the new, "alive" baby come from?!? That faux-defector Russian spy Vassily(he said "Vaseelich") should've narrated the story in the interrogation room a li'l more clearer.

Another unclear part of the movie was the part of the plot wherein SAlt has to run away from the CIA just to prove her worth to the Russians or somethin'. I mean, what if she gets killed with all the dangerous stunts that she's doin' while eluding the CIA and the feds? She could've just killed the Russian president while still bein' within the ranks of the CIA. But then again, that's how intricate the plot of this story is. Evelyn Salt is like Agent Sands(Johnny Depp in Once Upon A Time In Mexico). She's just playin' both sides I guess.

She's on the run towards the end part of the movie, which clearly shows that there will be a Salt Part 2. I think the new movie will be entitled, "Salt II, The Russians Strike Back".

As for the actors, they generally did pretty good.

Angelina Jolie did a lot of stuff that reminded me of The Matrix. the off-the-wal roundhouse kick conjured memories of Niobe(Jada Pinkett-Smith) during Reloaded(or was thet Revolutions, I can't remember). Doin' stunts on top of a truck on a freeway was like Morpheus doin' his thang. And Evelyn Salt on a big bike was definitely Trinity!

The other KGB mole looked familiar(Liev Schreiber). He was the one who played Sabretooth in the "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" movie. For me, he looks like he could be playin' Che Guevarra. His side burns are perfect! Unfortunately, no one could top Benicio Del Toro's performance as Ernesto.

Chiwetel Ejiofor was another team player. The English accent has already been neutralized, I guess ever since American Gangster. Or I guess he could really speak in both American, and English accents.

As for the other actors, they just didn't do enough to warrant my attention. Sorry because I was just drawn into the whole story. I say 8/10 for originality. Though the cold war plot never grows old. Original in that the story's kinda' fresh for me.




*Image from extramirchi.com

UFC 118(post-fight rant)

Another great night of fights(well almost all UFC events feature great fights anyway). I actually almost forgot that this PPV was Frankie Edgar's title defense against The Prodigy that is BJ Penn. I thought that the COuture-toney fight was the main event. So it was like a bonus, seeing the title fight in the end!

The first fight was bloody. It was Marcus "Irish Hand Grenade" Davis against the young buck Nate Diaz. A classic "striker VS grappler" match-up, though Davis has a decent ground game, and Nate isn't afraid to mix it up on the feet. And guess what happened. You would expect Nate to get outclassed on the feet because Davis is a legit boxer(used to box in the amateur circuit). But he was tooled by Nate and was even submitted on the ground. Davis was sleeping when the fight ended.


Here's Davis. Even the ring doctor looks like WTF?!?

2nd fight was a title contender match-up between Gray "The Bully" Maynard and Kenny "Ken-Flo"(yes, I know the moniker sucks) Florian. I expected The Bully to outwrestle KenFlo to a unanimous decision. And that's exactly what happened. Poor Kenny. With all that Muay-Thai and jiu-jitsu skills(he's a black belt), he just can't cut it against the Bully's wrestling.

3rd on tap was the Demain Maia-"Super" Mario Miranda fight. Maia was originally slated to face Alan "Teh Talent" Belcher but Belcher had to withdraw because of a damaged retina or something in the eye. If he doesn;t watch it, he could go blind and won't be able to compete in MMA anymore. But I have a feeling that he would be back.

Anyway, the 3rd fight was kinda' boring. I thought Super Mario was good on the feet. But Maia just managed to strike with him, and even take him to the ground. That fight should've included Belcher for it to be more exciting.

The 4th match was the co-main event of the evening between Randy Couture and James Toney. This was the fight that pits a boxer(Toney) against an MMA fighter(Couture). Just as I predicted, Toney was taken to the ground(where he looks like a fish out of the water). But I didn't expect Randy to submit his ass. It is also kinda' stupid for me that Randy earned his Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu black belt(it was handed to him by his Jiu-jitsu coach during the post-fight interview) after he submitted Toney. Randy should submit a black belt too to earn his own black belt, that's what I think how it should be.

The main event surprised me again. This was a rematch between "The Answer" and "The Prodigy"(the Prodigy lost on the first one) so I expected BJ Penn to come out stronger and do a dominating performance on Edgar. Oh how stupidly mistaken my prediction was.

BJ looked like he didn't upgrade anything in his game. It actually looked like Frankie did more adjustments on his game plan. He still looked like Mighty Mouse in that he was whizzing and darting here and there. And what's more, he repeatedly took Penn down! Until earlier, no one at lightweight has actually dominated BJ Penn like that. Frankie Edgar shows us that heart and skill could shut pundits and experts(I being one of 'em) up!

(my 2 cents on)Splice

I admit that I just watched this movie because there were no other movies to watch. I was quite hesitant to watch this flick because I already kinda' knew(based on the trailer alone)what will happen. And I wasn't wrong. this film really didn't leave me feelin' satisfied.

Personal feelings aside, I think this film just had one main theme. Reproduction. Or in layman's terms...SEX!

I also had the feeling that I was robbed. That's because as I've said in the beginning of this rant that I already knew what was comin' even before I witnessed the movie. It was just about "splicing" genes, that's it! They're sorta' like mixing and matching human and animal DNA/RNA(whatever!) to create a new specie. The only thing that I didn't know about was that they're actually trying to synthesize or create a new protein that could battle certain diseases.

Another "robbing" factor of this movie is the fact that it was for 2009. Or if you look on the internet, it would say "Splice(2009)". And it's already past the midway point of 2010. I should've just watched it on DVD. Too bad I don't have that option right now.

Just to get that "robbed" feeling away, I had to convince myself that I was sorta' entertained by everything. I didn't realize that Sarah Polley(who was Elsa Kast in the movie)has a li'l hotness in her. Now why the fuck did I not find that "li'l hotness" in her back in Dawn Of The Dead when she still looks virtually the same anyway?!?

Adrien Brody still looks like Raymond Bagatsing IMHO. He also looks geeky(perfect for his scientist role here). That is I think the "geeky hotness" that some females are looking for.

And I just want to add something completely irrelevant to the film. The lady who played Dren(a.k.a. "The New Specie") named Delphine Chaneac looks a lot like that chick FHM model who lives here in our subdivision named Jane Montemayor.







Being the Russian judge on this one, I give Splice a 5.5 out of a 10.



*images from IMDb and Jane Montemayor's personal Facebook account.

(my 2 cents on) Step Up 3D

3D is the shizzlenit!

Now how many times have I said that shite? I dunno'. I'm just a sucker for 3D. I'm actually a sucker for many things. I can suck your blood if you wanna.

This dance movie actually made me appreciate dancers more than I actually do. I often look at 'em as "soft", but they ain't. Their moves are hardcore as shit!

Believe it or not, I actually have watched all the Step Up flicks, thanks to my dancer sister. If I recall right, Chris Brown was in the second installment. I could also clearly remember the "Matrix Breakdancing" back in Step Up 1.

Now this 3rd(and should I say final?) Step Up installment couldn't come at a more timely manner. Not with all these 3D flicks sprouting up here and there. They just decided to cash in on the whole 3D thing, which is good for me personally because my eye always craves for candies.

The plot's kinda' stale and predictable. But who gives a fuck? All I want is for my eyes to be fed visuals. And this movie didn't disappoint.

I was ooh-in' and aaah-in so loudly, but my random movie seatmates didn't bat an eyelash. They were in awe too! Especially during the 2nd battle of the World Jam Dance Battle(or somethin' like that) where they improvised while all the water was ruining their stage. The 3D glasses were drippin' wet! That's the power of 3D!

Well enough of the damned movie experience. Here are my 2 cents...

-The lead guy looked like a rugged version of Ashton Kutcher. No kiddin'! Take a look for yourself.

-Moose was kinda cute in that he could bust moves even with all the scrawniness oozin' out of him.

-The Argentinian twins were just annoyances who added international flavor. Well I guess the black guy who had a heavy Euro accent added flavor to the mix as well. But technically, he looked like an Afro-American.

-The "Robot Dude" was ridic!

-The break-dancin' kids were really cute. Too cute for my taste to be doin' those dance moves.

-The "finger dancer" during the credits was off the chain as well! I didn't know that rollin' a joint could be translated into a dance move!


This movie warrants a passing grade of 7.5 outta 10 just because of the fact that I was blown away.




image source: http://www.i-watchnow.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/Step-Up-3D-Movie-Poster.jpg

(My 2 Cents On) The Expendables

Just when you thought you couldn't inject any more testosterone into a flick, then along comes this Stallone creation. Sly's a fuckin' genius! Who would've ever thought of assembling a gang of(over the hill) Hollywood action studs?!? No one this side of the Milky Way, that's who! Too bad my other faves like JCVD(Jean Claude Van-Damme for all you giblets not in the know), Chuck Norris and Steven Seagal didn't find their way into the Expendable roster.

Seemed like this movie was just about a bunch of guys who just want to hurt each other, as well as other guys. There was really no trace of a plot except for one that involves killing a former CIA agent who went rogue and now holds a small island in the Mexican Gulf named Vilena and controls the dictator there, as well as the drugs that flow out of that place.

But I really don't give a dang about any plots in this movie. I'm just a sucker for cheesy one-liners and massive explosions, plus a lot of blood!

Now let me throw in my 2 cents to the stars of this movie. Here goes...

Sylvester Stallone- could still run through the jungle like John Rambo(though not as fast). Him clashing with Dolph Lundgren brings back memories of Rocky 4.

Jason Statham- still has the 'ole Transporter moves, and the 'ole Turkish(Snatch) accent. Watching a lot of live UFC events proved to be beneficial too because he was able to infuse his MMA moves into the movie fight sequences(that goes for Stallone too, who was doin' an arm bar on Stone Cold).

Jet Li- showed traces of Once Upon A Time In China meets Romeo Must Die fight techniques. Less talk and more martial arts!

Dolph Lundgren- sounds exactly like Ivan Drago who just learnt English or somethin'. Why can't he sound like He-Man?!?

Mickey Rourke- minimum lines equals maximum effect. Less is more indeed.

Randy Couture- has probably done more Superman Punches than any other Hollywood actor in history. Also looks more "Natural"(no pun intended) than Rampage Jackson in front of a camera. Too bad A-Team didn't do as well as this flick when it was released back in June.

Terry Crews- added more muscle to the testosterone. Also busted a move(like he always does in his movies). Dancers really can't help it.

Stone Cold Steve Austin- stuck with his own Texan accent and tried to sound tough[like he always does in WWE]. A Stone Cold Stunner was actually executed in this flick. But it wasn't Austin who did it(could've been either Randy "The Natural" Couture or Jason "The Transporter" Statham).

Arnold Schwarzenegger- try and take a closer look and you will see that Arnold kinda' walks like The Terminator itself.

Bruce Willis- Mr. "Calm Demeanor" himself.


And oh! They could've picked a prettier Latina actress to play the part of the General's daughter(though I wouldn't think twice if this girl stripped right in front of me). The thing was that where were all the women in this film where all the alpha males were at?!?

And no kissing scene too? WTF?!? Stallone kinda' feinted a kiss, but that's the nearest thing to a kiss that we're ever gonna see in that movie. Too bad!

Well, that's basically my 2 cents. If you have a sharp eye, you would actually see the Nogueira twins(Minotauro and Minotouro, or probably just one of them) playin' Vilena soldiers. My guess is that Randy Couture invited 'em or something.

For all its worth, I give this a 6.5 out of a 10. A 9.9 out of 10 though for the superb casting and excessive explosions. The missin' .1 was for the MIA(missin' in actions) guys(JCVD, Chucky boy and Steven "Emotionless" Seagal).





*image source: http://www.collider.com/wp-content/uploads/The-Expendables-movie-poster1-404x600.jpg